Jack the Alarm Clock

Jack's Jem:

  So its the weekend and what does Jack not do on the weekend, yep sleep in.  Below is my introduction to the weekend.

  So I am in bed just at that point of  dozing back off to sleep after my poor wife had to get up for work.  You know that point when your really relaxed and everything is going to black, yeah that point.  It was at this moment that Jack entered my room in a fashion that would have made the LAPD SWAT proud.  For my military and police friends it was textbook violence of action.  The door swings open violently and light pours in form the hallway.  Before the door ever stops moving Jack is in the room and making his announcement; "GOOD MORNING DAD, WAKIE WAKIE EGGS AND BACIE!!!, ok I am going to watch cartoons now."   

  It was over as fast has it had happened.  I am now awake and stunned with no snooze button to mash.  

Enjoy 

The Dad, "I might as well get up"

What kind of Popsicle are you?

Jacks Jem:

  I made dinner the other night, OK more like we went out to dinner. It was on our way home that Jack struck with his usual flair.  This particular evening was particularly cold and once we were in the car Jack's sister said she felt like a Popsicle.  I decided to ask the kids if they were a Popsicle what flavor they would be.  Jack announced without any hesitation that he would be "Fartberry Flavored!"  I could not help it, so I asked were exactly do Fartberries come from?  To which I got this response; "you take a bunch of berries and you fart on them."  It is so clear now, and I am so not eating any Fartberries. 

Enjoy

The Dad

A Lesson in Stuffed Animal Etiquette

Jack's Jem:

The "Culprit"

   Today's Jem is the result of a particular goofy Jack and a stuffed animal.  So last night I told Jack he needed to go to bed, but in typical Jack fashion he did not want to go.  Luckily for us he was just begin goofy about going up to bed and was not angry.  I finally got him moving up the stairs and I noticed the small stuffed dog that Jack has had since he was born lying in on the living room floor. At this point I did what any parent would do who is tired of stepping on toys, I told him to take his dog up stairs.  

  Jack runs back down and grabs his little dog and stops in front of me and looks right at me.  He then places the dog in my lap and lifts the dogs back leg on my side.  Once the animal was in position Jack lets out a loud "pssssssssssssssssssssss" sound.  Now this happen very quickly and I am sitting there the whole time thinking to myself, he is not really going to have his little dog pretend pee on me. The Mom jumps in and says to him " Jack, don't you know it is rude to pee on people."  To which Jack responded with some amount of authority "Not for stuffed animals!" He then runs up the stairs without further performance. 

 

 Here the parents take a pause for laughing and after conferring with each other we decide one he has left us without a pithy response and two where is the book on stuffed animal etiquette. 

Enjoy

The "Glad I am not really wet" Dad.

PS.  Jack hears me conferring with the Mom this morning about this post and informs us that the dog thought I was a fire hydrant and had to go to the bathroom.  I will have to remember not to wear anything red and sit still too long.  

  

Tactical Maneuvering on the Food Front

Jack's Jem:

Right up front I want to say that my wife (aka the Mom) is a wonderful cook, and I know a lot of you are aware of that.  My waist line can also testify to that as well.  

Now, for those of you out there who are unaware for the majority Autistic children including Jack getting them to try a new food is a battle the even Napoleon would shy away from.  This warfare has been on going in home since Jack was old enough to throw baby food.  Well we the parents fire what might as well serve as a nuclear strike a few weeks ago by using the age old that is whats for dinner and there is nothing else and if you don't eat it, "its for breakfast!"  Jack stood his ground and went to bed with out dinner but over night his resolve waiver and by morning his defenses had collapsed.  He gave in and ate dinner for breakfast.  One small victory for the parents, but one battle does not win the war.

Fast forward to last night, the Mom made a fantastic homemade chicken noodle soup (aka a new food).   Jack took one look and attacked (well not physically) by refusing to eat.  So thinking back to our recent victory, we quickly responded with eat it now or eat it for breakfast.  Jack effectively dug in for a prolonged battle and went up stairs changed into his pajamas and went to bed (all without being told to do so).  Well the Mom stage his bowl of soup for a dawn attack.

Overnight Jack must of realized that he could not overwhelm us with a frontal assault and switched to insurgent warfare right out of the manual from Afghanistan:

1. Don't directly engage the enemy: Jack had gotten out of bed around 5 am and did not come get us. We went to get him up for school and found him playing quietly in his room. 

2. Be friendly with the enemy:  Jack came into my room and said to me "Good Morning Dad, give me my morning snuggles, I love you"  (I knew something was up here!)

3. Maneuver around the enemy:  Jack then told the Mom "I will just eat breakfast at school."

Since we controlled the battle space and in an effort to prevent the war from spilling over into his school and risking innocent teachers ( again not physically) we gave some ground and let him have the normal morning fare.  

But the ambush is set and it's CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP for dinner. OK I may have gone a little overboard with the warfare analogies but it was too much fun.  

Enjoy

The General, ok the Dad.  

My room did it and a Formal Introduction

Jack's Jems:

  Here is two short Jems from last night and this morning:

Jem 1:

  A few minutes after Jack went to bed he comes back out of his room to the top of the stairs and proclaims, wait for it:  "My room farted and it smells bad, so I opened the door to let it out!"  I am glad I was not drinking anything at the time.  

Jem 2:

  At 6 this morning Jack comes and jumps in our bed and very formally states "Mom, it is your son, Jack."  I am so glad he cleared that up.  

Enjoy

The Dad