The Gambler aka the parent

Jack's Jem:

  As I am writing this post I keep hearing the old Kenny Rogers' song "The Gambler" especially the part about knowing when to hold them and knowing when to fold them.  This post is not a true Jem, but it is more an observation of a thought process.  

  Now it is important to note that for a person who falls along the Autism spectrum routine and patterns are more important than just about anything, and Jack is no exception. When Jack's routine is changed or broken it makes an impression, that he does not forget, EVER!  My fellow parents of Autistic children can attest to the fact that changing a routine stands out in a child's memory like the lights of Las Vegas.

  I knew that a change in Jack's pattern was important, but until the other day I really did not get how that change was locked into his memory.  Every school morning Jack's lunch is made by one of his parents and in that lunch box goes the same items; one of those items is an oatmeal cream pie.  That pie has a specific place it goes in a pocket on the outside of said lunch box.  This routine has been going on since the beginning of this school year.  

  Now the other day Jack comes into the kitchen and sees me placing said pie in said pocket and announces "Dad you left out the oatmeal cream pie the other day!" At this instant I like most parents stopped and tried to remember if I was guilty of the offense, then when I couldn't remember I defended myself.  I told Jack that I had not forgotten the pie at any point.  To which Jack responded " you know you did not put it in the pocket the other day."  It was at this point I became the Gambler and had to decide to continue to argue even if I was unsure if I was right or fold and acknowledge the past mistake. 

  Jack was not letting me off either because during my whole internal monologue he stood by quietly and stared at me. I knew there was a very good chance he was right and I did what any good parent would have done, I told him "go finish getting ready for school."  

  It was only a couple of days later that I realized that I had folded without a fight.

Enjoy

The Dad